Sinister Trout Speaks

I usually watch movies late at night.

Its one of the few times I’m not bothered by my roommates and I can truly enjoy my flicks.

That being said, some movies require your full caffeinated attention or you risk your dreams being really messed up.

The following is one of my patent pending top tenish lists of movies you should never watch before you go to bed.

1. The Exorcist - that spider crawl down the stairs?  Yeech!!
2. 2001 - HAL scares me
3. 2010 - HAL still scary
4. Earnest Goes to Camp
5. Ringu - the scary one, not that Hollywood piece of crap!
6. Pi (can’t do the symbol - sorry)
7. Godzilla, All Monsters Attack - a talking Godzilla Jr. with the voice of Goofy!
8. A Clockwork Orange - one of the best but not before sleepy time
9. Brazil
10. Signs - I don’t care what people say - its scary!!
11. Seven - Sloth - nuff said!
12. M
13. The Dark Crystal - Muppets on crack!!
14. The Silence of the Lambs - yep
15. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - the original one of course!
16. Any film by Ingmar Bergman

I’m sure there is more… but I’m really tired and I feel like watching Pee Wee Herman’s Big Adventure. 

Any you would add to this list?

Produced by Disney, this flick  was an attempt to dive into the Star Wars/Sci-Fi wave. 

There are no real big names in this film - unless you consider Anthony Perkins, Ernest Borgnine, and Robert Forster stars.

The real actors of this movie are the robots - V.I.N.CENT, Maximillian, and B.O.B. voiced by Roddy McDowall and Slim Pickens.

The special effects aren’t too bad either.

Probably the nail in the coffin for this movie is the ending.  Vague at best, it strains to wrap up the movie in a final swan song.  If you can figure it out by all means please share!!

The Black Hole is probably one of the darkest movies Disney ever made and after its release they did just about everything they could to bury it and to wash their hands of this mess.

Still, I remember watching this movie over and over - driving my mother to insanity as she realized she had spent over $80 on renting this movie alone.

Maybe that’s why I got the movie on record for Christmas.

The Black Hole:  Ever heard of Maximilian Schell?  This movie is the reason why you haven’t.

OK listen up!

The other day I was quoting this amazing movie and the kid next to me didn’t have a clue what I was talking about.

I realized how old I was and what this kid was missing!

So for all you youngins out there you are about to get introduced to one of the best movies you could ever watch,

Trainspotting is about heroin.

More accurately its about kids in Scotland and how their lives revolve around heroin.  This movie has been credited for launching the careers of Ewan McGregor, Robert Carlyle, Ewen Bremmer, and Kelly Macdonald.

Danny Boyle, who directed, does an awesome job with this film.  I dig his style - which is a hip and comical look at how this drug can mess up your life.

So kids do yourself a favor and watch this movie.  You’re welcome!!

Trainspotting:  If you are even thinking of using heroin or visiting Scotland - you owe it to yourself to watch this movie first!!

So we all agree that Michael Caine rocks as Alfred in Nolan’s Batman films.  But beyond his portrayal as comic book’s famous butler, Mr. Cain’s film portfolio is deep.

He’s has been in some fantastic and some not so fantastic movies.

One of his better performances is as Sherlock Holmes in the comedy, Without A Clue.  The premise of this film is that Mr. Holmes is an out of work actor who is really an idiot.  The brains behind all his detective genius is none other than his assistant Dr. John Watson - played magnificently by Ben Kingsley.

The two play off each other brilliantly and the subtle English humor is what makes this movie a keeper.  Also look for child pornography king - Jeffery Jones as Inspector Lestrade from Scotland Yard.

Without A Clue:  The British are funny and this movie proves it.  Don’t look for over the top American humor here.

If you want to see a young Ethan Hawke and River Phoenix then look no further than the sleeper movie - Explorers.

This is a quirky Sci-fi flick that does have some bright spots and for some reason is one of my favorite movies.

Explorers is about three boys who start having the same dreams about outer space.  Come to find out their dreams are actually signals from aliens.  Together they start to build a spaceship out of junk and attempt to find who is sending them the nightly messages.

Eventually they meet the aliens who are actually teenagers themselves - listen for the voice talents of Robert Picardo.

The move on a whole isn’t much to brag about - I think there was some scuffle about whether the studio was going to release it or not which may have caused its abrupt departure from the theaters.

The real star of movie is the soundtrack, one of the best.

Explorers: Could have been a lot worse and its fun to see the late River Phoenix with a bowl cut.